Too Early? I think Not!

To start planning Little Hauss's 4th birthday party! You know me.....love to plan!
Really, all I want to get set is the date! We are already running into issues due to the fact that his actual birthday is on Labor Day! The reasonable thing to do is bump it to another weekend....before or after?
Well, I'm still a little selfish in the fact that my birthday will be falling before his and its a big one - 30 (on a Thursday no less, but you always want to leave the weekend open for possibilities of celebrating for days on end)!!! Plus, not everyone is off on Fridays (like me) so recovering from said celebrations might be difficult for those that have to work, so the best option is to have his birthday partay on the following weekend! Also, you want to ensure that everyone is in town and not still on vacays!
Now we come to the theme. He's been a little over the top about Spiderman for about a year, but lately, we've been going back and forth on other super heros and now Transformers.....hmmm? I know the logical thing would be to ask what he wants, but he's 3! He doesn't know, nor will he know if he still wants the same thing come September! Also, if you bring up the subject NOW, you risk living through torture for the next 8 weeks....trust me! I am toying with the idea of just a generic super hero party?
I do not love themey themes. That sounds ridiculous I know! I love a partial theme - like an overall theme, but not to be too matchy matchy! I just don't want ALL that goes with a said theme! I don't mind a cute invitation, maybe a napkin or cake, but I would rather fill in the rest with solid colors. Besides the fact that it is just too much of a headache looking at all of the matchy stuff, it can't be reused! At least with leftover solid plates, cups, etc....you can reuse for other occassions!
So, now, what's a girl to do??